The Lost Accord

The sheer audacity of the Iraqis continues to amaze. They are still holding out, for whatever reasons, on signing the “agreement on the status of U.S. troops in Iraq”. Why, heck, people, all it is is a document that, basically, makes Iraq into an American colony forever, and what on earth is wrong with that? These people take that old-fashioned “national sovereignty” thing too far, it seems to me. I mean, look, we still have troops in all the countries that lost World War II, and none of them ever registers a complaint (although they might, once the dollar sinks below the yen). We also have colonies in the form of make-believe countries like South Korea... although Panama slipped out of our grasp for some unfathomable reason. Oh yeah, it was Jimmy Carter; told you it was unfathomable. And don't they realize that becoming part of the American Empire is their last hope against... _not_ being part of the American Empire? Of course, every time this issue comes up, all you hear from our military is a lot of tut-tutting, huffing, and puffing: “serious consequences”... “great potential for losses”... “you can kiss McDonald's goodbye” (OK, they haven't said that yet; it's being held in reserve as the ultimate threat).

An interesting possibility, however, is that if Obama wins next week's election the Bush administration may just put the whole business on hold, in typical passive-aggressive fashion. They clearly want to pave the way for McCain's foreign policy success... er, I mean, as much success as Bush has enjoyed... but if he loses, then what do they have to gain by making things easier for Obama? But wait, if the agreement were to be signed before he takes office, then he would just have to live with it, wouldn't he? And that would be the perfect excuse for him not to get us out of Iraq – the dead hand of the Bush administration. Ah yes, now it all becomes clear...