Wednesday Whims and Woes

Well, I'm Floored

Hey – what ever happened to that 8,000 “floor” for the Dow? Well, I guess 7,997 is not statistically different. But could it be that floor has termites? Like for instance, the beneficiaries of the “bailout” who are doing pretty much as they damn please with the money, and the taxpayers can just eat their shorts? Maybe what we're seeing these days is the final flame-out-and-die of the “Me Generation” that really doesn't care about anything but its own momentary pleasures. Seems that our giants of industry and finance haven't been immune from that attitude either, in which case maybe they and the rest of their peer group deserve each other...

This Side Up -- Maybe

Now, I'm not one of those philistines who walks into a room of abstract expressionist paintings and huffs, “My kid could do that.” Because if this were true, I'd _have_ my kid “do that” and start raking in the big bucks. Still, it's amusing when things like this happen: “In England, two famous modern works by American artist Mark Rothko have been displayed incorrectly on their sides for years in a British museum.” And this was the Tate, not some small-town gallery run by a little old tea lady (as if!). But in any case, doesn't it tell you something about “modern art” -- especially the stuff that is going on the block for tens of millions per each – that even the experts can't tell which side is up? Isn't that a kind of metaphor for the entire art world, in fact – if not the world of Western culture overall? Now personally, I like Rothko's stuff. Those brooding blocks of fuzzy-edged color have a kind of presence. And frankly, if I owned one I'd feel entitled to hang it any old way I wanted. But that would be so... well, philistine.

Don't Take the Money, but Do Run

“Seven top executives at Goldman Sachs announced they were foregoing bonuses in 2008.” Oh, isn't that big of them! Well, it could be bonafide altruism... or maybe just good business... or maybe they hear the roar of the crowd of pitchfork- and torch-carrying peasants approaching the castle gate. In any case, it's a start, and I guess it's about all we can expect. They certainly aren't going to go skulking off with their tails between their legs. A Japanese businessman who screwed up this badly would have long since committed suicide – but they still have a sense of honor over there.

It's What's For Virtual Dinner

It turns out that 65% of all Internet spam – world-wide! -- was coming through one Silicon Valley hosting firm. So people who laugh at the idea of one single, massive, overarching world-wide conspiracy can take this as at least one sobering “but what if?” case in point.

Right, Schmight; Left, Schmeft

I've read it many times since the election. Despite the outcome, the country is still politically “center-right”, based on what people say their overall political position is. Now comes Tod Lindberg of the Hoover Institution, who says that's a myth, and that Americans are really “center-left” overall. Well, as usual, it's the use of outmoded terms, nebulous definitions, and bogus distinctions that has everyone confused. This results in things like people who think it's OK to invade other nations to cause “regime change”, and turn them into democracies, being called “conservatives”. The real truth is – and I didn't need the election to tell me this, but it certainly did reinforce the idea – Americans are, by and large, pro-big government, statists, and socialists. I say “socialist” as opposed to “communist” since I don't think most Americans are quite ready for out-and-out collectivism... although the agricultural sector seems to have made the adjustment quite nicely, and the unions aren't far behind. But overall, most Americans like to have their own “stuff” and their own “place”. They like having “titles” to things, and enjoy “ownership”. So communists we aren't. But as far as government regulating every last jot and tittle of existence, that's just fine – as is the current takeover of major sectors of the economy (AKA “statism”). Because, well, surely we can't be expected to take care of ourselves, can we? Or, watch out for our own well-being without substanital help? And as much as people may gripe about taxes, or about regulations they don't care for, they will fight like demons to keep their favorite programs and entitlements from going away. So – bottom line – we are all big-government socialists now.

Patty, I Hardly Know Ye

Pat Buchanan, in today's column, comes out for the bailout of Detroit, AKA the “Big 3” automakers. He gives some semi-sound economic and strategic reasons for this, but I suspect that behind it all is a sort of patriotic tic that says, what is America without General Motors, Ford, and Chrysler? Well, I guess it could be a more reasonable country that doesn't have an aristocracy of labor in the auto industry. And he admits that the Wall Street bailout is “the biggest bait-and-switch in political history”, but apparently he isn't afraid of something similar happening with the automakers. And, he says that “if the GOP blocks these loans and the industry dies, the party can forget about Ohio, Michigan, and the industrial Midwest." Hmmm... well, what about NAFTA? Did that hurt the Democrats in those states? Apparently not, since every one of them delivered for Obama. So it seems to me that the auto industry and related businesses are already a lost cause for the Republicans. And what would a bailout of this sort reinforce, i.e. reward, i.e. assure that it keeps happening? Extravagant “bargains” with the unions, for one thing. Gas-guzzling cars and SUVs that were designed back when gasoline cost almost nothing and we weren't fighting the entire Arab world for control of the Middle East. Engineering with “safety last” as a rule of thumb. Collusion with tire makers, road builders, oil companies, and politicians to destroy public transportation. Collusion with developers to stick everyone out in the suburbs, miles away from where they work, in order to force everyone into cars on a daily basis. (And who decided that suburban neighborhoods can never have sidewalks, hmmm?) Oh yeah... these are among the many blessings that Detroit has showered on our battered heads over the years. And now we're going to make it possible for them to stay in business for who knows how many more decades? I think Mr. Buchanan needs to splash some cold water on his face and admit that Detroit is part of the problem, and that a bit of “creative destruction” is in order. He can be just as patriotic about some other industry, I'm sure.

We Are Not G-Men, We Are Evo

It looks like the DEA has been permanently ejected from Bolivia, which gives great credit to President Evo Morales. Of course, he says that Bolivian authorities will fill the gap. Right, sure. Morales is “the former leader of a coca growers union”. It all sounds a bit mouse-that-roared-esque... but don't underestimate the significance this has for American dominance and hegemony in Latin America, not to mention world-wide. The leading edge of our brand of imperialism over the years has been to talk, or bribe, other nations, i.e. their leaders, into crushing their own citizens under the drug-enforcement boot, which is, in turn, motivated less by public health considerations than by a desire to spread our ancient and most vicious forms of Puritanism across the globe. What happens every time we invade another country (for their own good, of course)? Hot on the heels of “women's rights facilitators”, who are parachuted in on Day One, are the heavily-armed forces of the War on Drugs. Only later – far down the road, if ever -- do we start getting serious about things like infrastructure (which we destroyed in the first place) and “democracy” (which is typically a totally alien concept to the people involved). It has been said that “every good war is a religious war” -- maybe literally true in ancient times, and still true if you count communism and its offshoots as religions. But as to the “religion” of American-Puritanical “wars” on “drugs”, that is something that is best buried with the likes of J. Edgar Hoover. Evo is right – keep those fanatics and Rambos off Bolivian soil. They've got enough trouble without our bluenoses descending on them in droves and disrupting age-old economic entities and social customs.

Poppies – We'll Make Them Wheat

On the other hand, farmers in Afghanistan are starting to switch from raising opium to raising – guess what – food! This, because food prices have gotten high enough so that food crops are competitive with opium. Now – this is just a wild guess – but the last time I read about food costs going up, it was because of ethanol, which is, of course, a uniquely American vice. So it looks like one piece of folly – the ethanol craze – is helping to counterbalance another piece – the “war on drugs”, which is the primary reason for the high price of opium in Afghanistan and elsewhere. It's good to know that stupidity can't multiply itself indefinitely, and that eventually one part of it creates a silver lining that helps neutralize the other. Of course, all of this could have been avoided if our politicians had just... but no, that would never happen. It was about to say “been sensible, rational, sane, and humane”.

Bush Pull Out – Your Father Should Have

Admiral Michael Mullen, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, says “it would take the United States two to three years to withdraw from Iraq completely.” Wow – this shows a singular lack of logistic creativity. How long did it take us to put those troops into Iraq? A few months at most. As Ron Paul said, they were sent over there, they can be brought back (implication: in the same amount of time). What is this torpor that overtakes out military leadership whereby an invasion can happen in weeks or even days, but a withdrawal has to take years? Just run the tapes in reverse, guys. It's easy.

Bare Bear Market

I don't know if this is some consolation, but the Russian government is also considering bailing out some of the “oligarchs” who struck it rich during the “privatization” era. So let's see – these were the guys who were smart enough to be at the head of the line when the former USSR sold off most of its publicly-owned (so to speak) industries and properties. They bought the stuff at a steal, got it running better than ever, made fortunes, and are now looking to that same government for a bailout. And the funny thing is, they'll probably get it! The difference between them and our own home-grown oligarchs? Morally, not much. Historically, most of our guys built up their businesses with, admittedly, a lot of help from the government, but it would be an exaggeration to claim that the government actually handed those businesses over to them in a neat package. Interestingly, the response of the Russian government might just be based on the desire to re-absorb some of those enterprises back into the state system. The difference, once again? The U.S. Government is absorbing businesses that it has never had a controlling hand in – regulating yes, but not really in charge. Does our government have a “yen” for taking over the private sector? In Russia's case it's more like nostalgia – gee, remember when we had a “planned economy” and no unemployment? In our case it's more like, we know how to run businesses as well as those greedy CEOs – just give us a chance. After all, look at the fine job we've done with things like urban renewal, agriculture, health care, and so on. It's going to be very interesting to see these parallels develop – unto total folly, undoubtedly.

Post Toasties

The most shocking thing about retiring from the federal government is that I finally found out how much Post-It notes cost. Those things are damn expensive! Up until I retired, I never bought any. The few that I – ahem -- “utilized” at home were more than balanced by the decent pens I bought on the open market and took to work, in lieu of those dreadful, leaky government “low-bidder” ballpoints that they persisted in handing out year after year. Don't tell me bureaucrats don't have plenty of survival skills!